Monday, February 12, 2007

Whistling Dixie...and other things

Amazing how things do turn around. A Bush die-hard, anti-gay marriage evangelical pastor bones a dude in sauna, and then gets "cured" of his "ailment"and is hetero again! Now this! Remember all of the redneck DJs on the these "America First" country stations who attacked the Dixie Chicks? Recall the rancor on the Country Music Awards from blond gorillas like Toby Keith or cracker-hoes like Reba McIntire (and let's not forget the ire Tim McGraw drew when he declared that he and lovely Faith were in fact Democrats and supported the Chicks' right to free expression) and the lovely exposition of all things ugly that bubbles beneath the SUV and American idol veneer of our republic? Chick CDs were burned. It matched the stupidity of renaming French Fries "freedown fries." Hey last time I checked, there'd be no USA with the effete frogs, but that's for anoher post...


Well, last night the Chicks shined. You gotta love Natalie Manes channeling Bart Simpson..."Heh-Heh." You know, I'm not a fan (other than that song "Goodbye Earl"),but these chicks showed some balls, and I love it when folks show some balls to The Man. Especially when aimed at The Man's foolish proxies: rednecks.

Enough about music. Here's more of my Monday bitching and moaning: 1. Gates. This guy was supposed to be a fresh breath in the Pentagon and Cabinet. The dude's a cypher. Iran helping Iraqi insurgents? That would be tantamount to Catholics in the Republic of Ireland shipping arms to Orangemen in Northern Ireland 30 years ago. Get out of the the country. Invade pakistan instead. 2. Snow and ice. In DC, we have many immigrants from sunny climes. They cannot drive in winter weather. Period. Call me Archie Bunker but it is true. Couple that with suburban housewives who drive their mega SUVs and vans as if they really are busting though a snowdrift in Wyoming as they pull a load of longhorn steers--yet they are merely on their way to the mall. Gee whiz, it's amazing how the SUV in commercials never seems to reflect what it's actually being used for. And Lord, no one ever tells Mrs. Gated Community that these things brake just like cars in snow and ice. Now you know why I dread winter in Washington. 3. Ignorant white people. I know, that's one's a throwaway, and see my post of 2/9/07 below on the elevation of all things GHETTO as a counterpoint, and possibly, if I may play Devil's Advocate, a cause. But hey, let's start with Aussie PM John Howard attacking Barak Obama. What a douchebag--he looks like the dickheaded dad in "Muriel's Wedding." Or Dick Cheney's younger brother? Yeah, Australia has a whole 1,400 troops (no combat) in Iraq. As the for some other douchebags, moist and dripping, check this out:

In Savannah this past weekend, artist/photographer Cedric Smith, who's work was introduced by Valerie Dillon at the Dillon Gallery in Cheslea, W. 25th Street and will have a massive show in April, was taking a break from another exhibition. Wearing horn rimmed glasses and an argyle sweater, he entered a toney stationery store,browsed, then entered a typical, posh "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" Savannah antique shop. The antique shop owner seemed very nervous;the woman took a call, made a call, then excused herself, leaving Cedric alone and perplexed. As he was about to leave, ten SWAT officers rushed him, assault sub-machine guns ready to riddle himwith 10mm rounds if he didn't hit the floor. Cedric hit the floor.

You know the rest of the story. A black man who bore no physical resemblance to Cedric at all (and who was wearing a long ragged coat, rather than an argyle sweater) had been robbing some establishments nearby. The man suposedly hid a sawed-off shot gun under that coat. Well, through his agent and the local gallery owner, Cedric is seeking apologies from Savannah PD's jarheads. But mostly, he wants an explanation from the stationery store owner and the antique proprietor. Apparently they were the ones who called the cops. Now, Savannah prides itself on the same urbane, artsy, southern-patrician "we're above that sort of thing" that its sister city Charleston, or places like bucolic Charlottesville or Asheville, also claim. Okey-dokey. The owners refuse to talk to him. He doesn't want to kick their asses. He just wants an explanation. He should talk to Natalie Manes. Success is the best revenge...then go back and slap the shit out of those crackers.

7 comments:

Dodd W said...

Yeah, yeah, it was the Dixie Chicks & Rick Rubin's (co-founder of Def Jam) night. I suppose Russell Simmons is out pontificating on the state of hip hop, ghetto fab life, and largese while Rubin continues to make an indelable mark on the music industry.

Virtually everyone that won an award last night thanked Rick Rubin. If you look at his resume of acts he's produced, especially post Def Jam days and the variety of genres, all you can say is my gawd: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rick_Rubin#List_of_albums_produced_by_Rick_Rubin. I wonder what Simmons thinks of his former partners ubiquituousness.

While the Dixie Chicks are getting back at red & middle America. Rubin is showing who the talent really was in Def Jam. Yeah, yeah, Russell is a pioneer who's heavy into Yoga and Buddhism these days, but he's also only now beginning to realize he has a responsibility beyond the almight dollar.

Chicama Vineyard said...

Do you have a link for Cedric Smith the artist? You have one for Dillon Gallery.

This man Rick Rubin is a white guy?

Anonymous said...

One of the pioneering influences in rap/hip hop and the producer of most of the early Def Jam hits is white guy Rick Rubin. Doh!

lance williams, sr. said...

Nothing on Anna Nicole?

Chicama Vineyard said...

I'm sorry--I didn't know about Rick Rubin but now will certainly do some research or ask my daughter! We hear of Russell Simmons and Sean Combs all the time but not Rick Rubin.

IndispensableDestiny said...

I was in Seattle this past December when they got a few inches of snow and then ice. The drivers there are worse than anything I've seen in DC or Baltimore. Hundreds of cars abandoned on the interstate.

Christopher Chambers said...

Snow: I haven't been to Seattle but I think I'll pit the clueless fools in Balto-Wash area against anyone. Again, on top of the usual menaces, you have folks from such snow capitals and San Salvador and Lagos and Addis Abbaba barrelling through intersections with little thought (or insurance).

Rubin:I think Russell Simmons has succumbed to the retarded vanity of someone like Diddy, or even Jay-Z (look at the clones of his girlfriend he's producing). In other words, I'm great not because I'm talented, and have produced and written albums for the best of the best. No, I'm great because I live in a mansion in Short Hills, NJ. I think he needs to have a stroke, or three ghosts have to visit him Christmas eve, so he'll grow some perspective and come back "home" to the creativity Rubin never lost. In other words, the fawning asskissers at the BET should be schooled that Rubin, not Russell, was the genius behind Def Jam, true, and thus a father of the genre.

Anna Nicole: OK Lance--my problem is this new drama showing how she, her breasts and her minions basically bribed their way into the Bahamas, and Howard K Stern still hides behind the largesse of the officials they corrupted. The racial angle: why does it always have to be black nations in the Caribbean and Africa where the public officials have their hands out so obviously. Show a little savvy, dudes. Keep the graft on the DL, like here, in the Middle East and Eastern Europe...

Dixie Chicks: I stand by my Toby Keith and Reba comments. Go fly your stars and bars elsewhere...maybe on the same street as the dude with the swastika

Cedric Smith: will update you guys