Saturday, May 05, 2007

What's more exiciting than the DC Madame?

In the D.C. area on Thursday May 10th? Come see and hear author Colin Channer at Vertigo Books in College Park, 630pm discussing his newest work, The Girl with the Golden Shoes (more to come on this Monday). Or stay home and check this blog to see my interview of Washington Post reporters Kevin Merida and Michael Fletcher, authors of Supreme Discomfort: the Divided Soul of Clarence Thomas.

The Jamaican bard and non-fiction is all boring, y'all say? Nah. and they are more exciting than what I just saw on ABC. ABC, like American Idol, like Heroes, like Spider Man 3, truly "jumped the shark" when it aired this ridiculous "DC Madame" story. When "Missy Ann" pimps, it's big news. When it's someone named "Bishop Magic Don Juan" or "Mister Whitefolks," and the hookers are of color, no biggie.

Yet this was the huge scandal that wasn't. First, "jumping the shark" refers to a TV term of art, minted by online media critics when "Fonzie" on Happy Days jumped his motorcycle over a shark tank. It literally marks a moment when a show has lost its steam, gotten stupid, etc. etc. Like James on Good Times dying. Or any point on Desperate Houswives. Grey's Anatomy's momentl ikely came and went, however, as we are pre-programmed to accept any insipid soap opera these days. The publishing industry, when it comes to black books and authors, indeed added MORE sharks to the damn tank. Nuff said...
Well, after all of this fanfare, ABC only dwelled on two idiots who were "newsworthy." First of course was Mr. Tobias, Condi Rice's undersecretary at USAID who was also the Bush Administration's mouthpiece on world HIV prevention (preaching abstinence of course) and keeping money from any group that even mentioned abortion in family planning. Good enough for a call girl at the Hay-Adams. The next was the Navy's big shot who authored the whole "Shock and Awe" strategy that so wowed the Red State dullards at the beginning of the Iraq War and now means absolutely nothing. Clearly this dude had some d*ck issues. I guess he also came up with the strategy of using our soldiers as bait to draw in terrorists who were never there in the first place, turning Iraq into a new school Verdun, complete with that WWI battle's ruinous irony? (look up Verdun on wikipedia, you dummies!)

The rest of tricks were supposedly people only recognizable inside the Beltway, so ABC, having already sucked you in with this nonense, just dumped the phone records. Now fanboys and girls I am sure there are a lot of partners in big DC law firms, certain lobbyists, fat pig real estate developers and bankers (who aren't otherwise pedophiles), parking lot czars, heads of foundations, local university presidents etc. on this list. I'll publish it on this blog when I get ahold of it...and I will get ahold of it. The U.S. Attorney's already jumped his own shark and says he won't use the list at trial. Is that not newsworthy? Why not? Screw you, ABC--is your DC bureau chief on that list?

What bothers me is (1) it's always the tricks who are seen as victims. They are part of the crime. The GIRLS are victims. Indeed one, a professor at the University of Mayland who neededextra cash to keep her home and feed her kids (Lord, I just joined up with UM!!! Better check my W-2), killed herself two weeks ago when Pimp Palfrey went public. And (2) these men on the list are usually the same people who tell you you are deficient, you are late with your payments, you are fired, you are downsized, your grant application is denied, your son is going to Iraq, you're gulity, you're liable, you're lying on the stand, you don't have as much money as them so you'll loose...and on and on. Bloody hypocrits. Time they suffered for a change, and they are humbled. Yeah, some of their wives will forgive them, for the same reason the FDA forgives the Red Chinese for poisoning us and our pets. Greed, self interest. But oh, maybe someone will learn from this, and change from hypocrisy to humility...

3 comments:

scott bean said...

I wouldn't say this is "jumping the shark." This is the usual ratings pimping, nothing more. This is the oldest game in the world about the world's olderst profession.

Looking forward to Clarence Thomas book interview. My wife saw Colin Channer at the PG Co. Library and would love to see him again.

Chicama Vineyard said...

I agree that the "johns" must be exposed even if they aren't members of Congress. They are still influential men who do indeed have some importance to the news and to the American people if they are lobbyists or big givernment contractors. I did not see the ABC report but they seem to have deflated. Ms. Palfrey is nothing more than a pimp and she and the johns are the problme not the women. I see the underside of this business here in Mobile, and it doesn't matter whether the woman is a legal secretary at a big law firm, or one of these "meth queens" in a trailer park they are victims!

Lisa said...

It seems to be bigger news outside of the "Beltway" then it is inside, as we expect Washington to be debauched, eh?