Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Hump Day Humping...

CELTICS. Okay, I knew their owner Wyc Grousbeck well in college (and briefly in law school). He was one of the biggest scrotumheads in the world, but I'm happy for him today...and Allen, Garnett & Co. Yes, still think Stern is as big a gangster as Bud Selig and as much a manipulative corporate robot as the tools who control the NFL...and the NBA is subject to the ratings fix more often than not...but in these bloated playoffs comes a message which I hope is not lost on kids out there hoping to emulate the Kobes, LeBrons, Iversons etc. And not just in basketball, but in all endeavors. The one-man show, megastar, plump with corporate endorsements, unfettered by matters of image and discrimination which we regular folk face, all about the dollar bills, all about the trappings and such...was yoked, embarrassed by defense, by a team. Metaphor & allegory thusly submitted...
ERIC HOLDER. This election is forcing whitefolks to stand and deliver. Come up with all kinds of excuses, from Michelle Obama's term papers 20 years ago and cookie recipes to Barack's name to what--Eric Holder? Eric Holder's a tool--this I know, folks! But if being a tool is the threshold for evil than everyone in or associated with the Bush Administration other than Christy Whitman (who was forced out at EPA for having too much sense) should be exiled to Antarctica.
I think Barack's people need to accept, if they haven't already, that their "movement" view of American politics is a bullshit as the GOP's more mythologic-based creed. ALL politics is tribal. Ironic to use that word which white morons have used on us. Rent/re-watch Scorsese's "Gangs of New York" (with Daniel Day-Lewis's best performance in my mind, and Leo DiCaprio). That vision of New York, 1846-1863 is America. Come on, whitefolks...you had it in ya all along. Rent/re-watch another favorite flick of mine-- "Gladiator" with Russell Crowe. Check out the first five minutes, including this charming scene taken directly from the final script draft:
MAXIMUS: They say no. [tracking: a white and bloodied horse rides within the ranks of the Roman soldiers. A barbarian comes to the forefront of the German lines, waving the horseman's head, tossing it into the mud....]
BARBARIAN: Ihr seid verfluchte hunde! (You are damned dogs!)[As the barbarian calls out his cry, his mangy band of barbarians emerge from the forest, shaking and waving their spears and shields, ready to fight.]
NASCAR dads, perhaps? Hahahaha. Could be--clamouring for off shore drilling which they know in a portion of their skulls is silly and will only enrich the rich, and won't do shit about gas prices, but hey, programmed nonetheless to clamour for clamouring's sake, because some sinister tribe must be threatening the order and counter-clamouring. So stop whining about things being unfair to Holder and get your own Maximus...
THE INCREDIBLE HULK FLICK. I'm not Al Sharpton. Clearly. But damn--has anyone asked why they saw the need to usher The Hulk and Abomination uptown to destroy all of Harlem from Malcolm X Blvd to Old Broadway? Baltimore scion Ed Norton is a Harlem afficianado like all pseudo-hip white boys, but lawd have mercy!
Look, gentrification is one thing, but this is Donald Trump-ery. How many condos can Big Green One make way for? And did they really need to pound the Apollo Theatre to bricks and pebbles? Hey, even "Cloverfield" didn't cross 110th. If he had, and turned right--you'd have found pieces of him in a couple of tons of beans and rice, or wrapped in a few million empanadas. hehehehe

7 comments:

Pebbles Flintstone said...

Chambers, you are one crazy dude! You are at it again. Nice commentary. Especially on the Holder issue. What next? I for one, think Obama has the guts to get past all of this and (fingers crossed) triumph. Now, if we can just get Colverfield to cross 110th st. Somebody pass the hot sauce! Hahaha!

Anonymous said...

Celtics rule. Lakers limp. Justice is DONE!!

PS The Eric Holder item is yet another distraction but you do wish they would fight back.

carl said...

These random musings are interesting for a change.

Lisa said...

I agree with all of this, but when are you going to say something about the Hulk Hogan Family?

tchaka owen said...

Nice work, Chris. I enjoyed all 3 bits.

Natalie said...

I had a blast watching The Incredible Hulk but I was real pissed off about what they did to Harlem. The government just don't care about folks.

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